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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25439827">Of Honest Conversations and a Cookie Bouquet</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Diary/pseuds/Diary'>Diary</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Glee, Leverage</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bisexual Eliot Spencer, Cookies, Demisexual Parker (Leverage), Families of Choice, Friendship/Love, Getting Together, Late Night Conversations, Matchmaking, Multi, OT3, Pansexual Alec Hardison, Polyamory, Relationship Negotiation, Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 07:34:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,498</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25439827</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Diary/pseuds/Diary</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>AU. Instead of New York, Glee Club ends up in Portland, and Hardison, Parker, and Eliot decide to play matchmaker for Sam and Mercedes. Complete.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alec Hardison/Parker/Eliot Spencer, Sam Evans/Mercedes Jones</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Of Honest Conversations and a Cookie Bouquet</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Seeing Eliot is glaring at him, Hardison shifts the phone. “I’m putting you on hold.”</p><p>From up on a rafter, Parker says, “You know they’re just going to put you on hold right back.”</p><p>He shrugs. “They’ll regret that.” Turning fully to Eliot, he continues, “What? Look, you haven’t been here long enough for me to even do anything.”</p><p>“You’re trying to order a cookie bouquet?”</p><p>“Trying being the operative word here. These idiots-”</p><p>“There’s this teenage couple that Hardison’s gotten attached to.”</p><p>“Babe. Potential teenage couple, and given that they’re teenagers, let’s, uh, find a different word. I’m just trying to- ah, hell, is this creepy?”</p><p>“I don’t think it is,” Parker says.</p><p>Blowing her a kiss, Hardison turns expectant eyes on Eliot.</p><p>“No, it’s not creepy,” Eliot says. “But why are you trying to order from outsiders?”</p><p>“None of the staff here knows how to do a professional cookie bouquet. I’d just call you up, ‘Hey, Eliot, I know you’re on some important mission, but think you can squeeze in some time to make a cookie bouquet for these two kids who aren’t a case, aren’t anything, really, to any of us?’ Yeah, you’d take that real well, I’m sure.”</p><p>Rolling his eyes, Eliot takes the phone, and hanging it up, he asks, “Are these two here now?”</p><p>Flipping down onto a recliner, Parker turns on the security screens. “Yep.”</p><p>…</p><p>Mercedes Jones wants to kill Rachel Berry most of the time, but right now, she’s at a new level of wanting to kill her.</p><p>Rachel was supposed to get coffee with her and Sam, but instead, she’s going on a shopping trip with one of Sam’s ex-girlfriends, likely, because she thinks it’ll help her get Quinn’s ex-boyfriend.</p><p>In the past, she wouldn’t have minded getting coffee with Sam, just the two of them, but the last two times they’ve been alone together, he’s acted weird.</p><p>Keeping her sigh inside, she digs through her pocket. “Hey, I found these coupons online. Since we may not all get together for lunch, want to order a burger and fries, and I’ll order me something?”</p><p>He looks at them suspiciously before schooling his face, and she knows- “Look, Sam,” grabbing his wrist, she squeezes, and making sure to keep her voice quiet, she says, “I know things are rough. The truth is, I can’t understand exactly what you’re going through. But I don’t feel sorry for you, and I’m not trying to make you feel worse.”</p><p>“Okay? An ad for these coupons popped up online, and I really do think everyone will probably be too busy for us to meet up at the hotel for lunch. So, if you want them, you can have them.”</p><p>Nodding, he smiles, and it’s such a soft, sweet smile that she feels her heart changing rhythm.</p><p>“Hi, I’m Amy. Just you-”</p><p>They turn, and she sees the waitress, a familiar brown woman, is the one who, unfortunately, had to deal with them all yesterday.</p><p>“I promise, we’re totally not going to sing in the middle of the restaurant again,” Sam quickly says. “On my honour as a high school student who could possibly be the ancestor of a bonafide Jedi someday.”</p><p>Trying not to laugh, she agrees, “Yeah, promise.” Then, remembering what else happened, she adds, “And uh, Puck, the idiot who kept trying to sneak drinks and hitting on you and the other waitresses, he won’t be coming back. Ever.”</p><p>“Okay, then,” Amy says with a smile that says, even though she’d like to, she doesn’t exactly believe them. “Aside from him, will any of the others be joining you two?”</p><p>“No, it’s just us.”</p><p>She suddenly realises her hand is still around Sam’s wrist, and she quickly removes it.</p><p>“I’ll bring some flowers to the table. What would you two like to drink?”</p><p>“I’ll have a café miel, please.”</p><p>“Water for me. Thanks,” Sam says.</p><p>She wonders if there’s anyway she could convince him to let her buy him a latte macchiato or Arnold Palmer.</p><p>Amy hands them menus.</p><p>“I thought Jedis were in the past. Didn’t you go on this long rant about how everyone misses the ‘a long time ago’ in the Star Wars movies?”</p><p>A smile breaks out on Sam’s face. “It- first, it wasn’t a rant. But Kurt let me use his laptop last night, and I found this awesome video about the cycles of time. You wouldn’t happen to like the newer <span class="u">Battlestar Galactica</span>, would you?”</p><p>Shaking her head, she says, “I’ve heard about it. Think I saw a clip once, but I didn’t understand what was going on.”</p><p>“Right, well, short version: Aliens that look like humans end up trying to find a new planet after a big war with robots who look like them. And they end up landing on Earth where primitive humans are. Anyway, there’s this line, “All this has happened before, and all this shall happen again.” So, if Jedis were real, which, I know they’re not, they could be in our past, we could totally come from a line of them, even though, that might mean some of them broke their vows, and we, people in general, I mean, could someday have Jedi great-great-great grandchildren.”</p><p>She manages not to say, ‘You’re adorable.’</p><p>He is, though, and looking at him, wide-eyed, beautiful smile, she does feel sorry for him. Sorry he’s having to deal with things no kid should, sorry she hasn’t exactly helped, has outright made things worse, in the past, and sorry for his family. His baby brother and sister especially shouldn’t be going through all this, and his parents- she doesn’t know how hers would handle something like this happening to them.</p><p>“Look, Sam, if you want something besides a burger, you could pick something close to it in price, and I’d buy it and use the coupon for myself.”</p><p>“No, but thank you. A burger actually sounds really good.”</p><p>A big vase of colourful flowers is set on the table. “Here we go. They’re almost as cute as you two,” Amy cheerfully says.</p><p>She suddenly realises Amy might think they’re together. This isn’t Ohio. Two people as different as her and quarterback Sam- maybe, around here, such a thing could happen.</p><p>“Are you two ready to order?”</p><p>“Go ahead.” Sam smiles at her.</p><p>Suddenly feeling awkward, she tries focusing on her order rather than how much she really wants to kill Rachel Berry.</p><p>Sam orders his.</p><p>“And to drink?”</p><p>“Just the water, thanks,” Sam quietly says.</p><p>Amy looks at her, and she says, “I still have plenty of coffee.”</p><p>“Are you sure? The coupon covers drinks with the meals.”</p><p>Something doesn’t make sense, and thankfully, Sam looks just as confused as she feels.</p><p>Picking them up, Amy studies them for a second before setting them back down. “Uh-huh. See? It covers our burger special and a similarly priced meal or lower with drinks included.”</p><p>Staring down, she feels something itching at her skin.</p><p>The coupons look slightly different, but it’s not like they suddenly changed from a few seconds ago to now. She knows she must have just not paid enough attention.</p><p>“Oh, wow, I totally missed that part. Sorry,” Sam says. “I have dyslexia.”</p><p>“Yeah, and I just wasn’t paying attention.”</p><p>Amy smiles. “So, would either of you like something else to drink?”</p><p>“An Arnold Palmer, please,” Sam says.</p><p>“Nothing for me right now.”</p><p>Amy leaves, and she asks, “So, in this battle star show, modern humans would be half-alien?”</p><p>“Uh, maybe. There’s this theory that the Kobols, the aliens, were originally humans who had to leave Earth a long time ago. But-” His eyes are suddenly much softer. “Thank you, Mercedes. For all this.”</p><p>“Hey, it ain’t nothing. Like I said, I just found the coupons online.”</p><p>“Yeah, but that’s not all. I know you feel bad for me and my family, but you haven’t really treated me differently. I mean, most of the others in Glee haven’t, either, but still, I know how it’d be if it got out around school.”</p><p>“I hope it doesn’t, but you know, if it does, we’ll all be there for you. And you’re not different,” she says. “I’m sorry for judging you, Sam. You don’t really strike me as the cheating type or the type who’d help someone cheat, but I believed the worse. I wish this wasn’t the answer, but I’m glad I was wrong.”</p><p>“Speaking of boyfriends, I heard Kurt was trying to set you up with one of the players on my team, but I don’t know who, and Kurt went on a rant about some actress who wore something at some awards show, I think, I don’t know, I left the room at about the thirty minute mark, when I asked him.”</p><p>Unable to keep her sigh in, she rolls her eyes. “I’m sure the guy’s great, but he’s also one of the like twenty black kids at school. Don’t get me wrong, I’d like to find a nice black man someday to bring home, but I really don’t think the fact we’re both black should be a reason to go on a date. And besides, a football player.”</p><p>Sam frowns. “Hey. We’re not all bad. If you ever ended up on Pandora, my knowing Na’vi would be a big help, and I’m learning Klingon! Not that that’s a good reason to date someone, either, but I’m just saying, some football players have cool things to offer.”</p><p>She lets herself laugh. “Well, if I ever get stuck in some fictional universe, I know you’d be my best and possibly only hope for getting out.”</p><p>Suddenly, he looks- shy? “I would, you know.” He looks down before looking up to meet her eyes. “Try my best to get you back here.”</p><p>“Yeah, I know. You’re a good guy, Sam. And that’s why I’m not treating you different. I learned something new about you, but it doesn’t really change anything about who you are.”</p><p>“It kind of does,” he quietly says. “Um, before this happened, I hope I wasn’t spoiled, but I was definitely- privileged. I didn’t realise how much I got just handed to me. I knew there were kids who didn’t have near as much, but I didn’t really understand.”</p><p>“I still don’t,” she says. “Knowing what you and your family’s been going through, it’s been something of an eye-opener for me, but I’ve always been privileged, too, and I still am now.”</p><p>“Good. I’m glad.”</p><p>Surprised, she doesn’t know how to respond, and Amy reappears with the Arnold Palmer.</p><p>After she’s gone, Sam continues, “We all know Rachel’s going to make it big someday on Broadway or whatever, but you- you’re the best dancer in Glee, and I like your voice better than hers.”</p><p>Taking in the way his cheeks are suddenly all red, she hopes he just took a drink too fast instead of about to get sick. “Actually, I think Mike and Brittany are the best dancers. And I don’t know. I really hope I can make it big, but my parents are always talking about me being realistic.”</p><p>“What do they think is realistic?”</p><p>“Oh, you know. Something conventional. Or maybe that’s not the right word, but doctor, lawyer, maybe a school teacher. I’ve tried telling them what a mess Mr Schue’s life has been, but their response was, if I did that, to get a job in a much better school district.”</p><p>He chuckles. “My parents want me to get an office job someday. Major in business. But with my dyslexia, I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”</p><p>“I hope you can find a job you like that makes good money,” she offers.</p><p>“Thanks. I think Stacie might end up being a pilot.”</p><p>“She likes flying?”</p><p>…</p><p>Lunch is over too soon, and she wishes- it doesn’t matter. Once they get back to Ohio, Sam will go back to hanging out with Quinn and Finn and the rest of the football team all the time, and she’ll go back to hanging out with Kurt whenever he can make time for her.</p><p>Even if she doesn’t make it big, maybe, adulthood will mean some decent, long-lasting friends.</p><p>“Maybe, we could come back here someday,” Sam says. “Just you and me, I mean. I could buy you lunch or dinner. Breakfast. Whatever.”</p><p>She’s surprised by how hurt he looks at her rolling her eyes. “Sam, I printed out some coupons that I didn’t even read properly. That probably could’ve gone really bad. And like I said, everyone else will probably be getting their own lunches. I just didn’t want to be stuck in the hotel with Mr Schue and Puck or be a third or fourth wheel.”</p><p>“I get that. I’m glad, though, it was you and me.”</p><p>He looks and sounds so sincere that half of her hurts, and the other half- she smiles. “Me, too. Speaking of coming back, if the others are busy again tomorrow, do you want to come back? I’ll see if I can find some more coupons, and be sure to read them properly if I do, but if not, we could just do coffee.”</p><p>“That sounds great.”</p><p>An intense-looking white man comes over with a large load of something in his arms. “Amy told me about this Glee club you two are part of.” He looks at Sam. “Quarterback?”</p><p>“Uh, yes, sir. Most of the boys in Glee are. I mean, football players, not all quarterbacks.”</p><p>“Here you go.” It’s food, she realises, when the man sets wrapped containers down. “Someone will get the door when you two are ready to leave. All this needs to be wasted soon. Eat it within the next three or four days.”</p><p>Then, he walks away before Sam can even fully get out, “Thank you.”</p><p>“Uh-” She glances over at the kitchen the man’s disappeared to. “That was weird.”</p><p>“Really weird,” Sam agrees. “But nice?”</p><p>She jumps at Amy’s voice saying, “Hi, sorry about that.”</p><p>“That was Eliot Spencer, the head chef and one of the co-owners of this place. He’s been away for the last two weeks, and our other cooks- do things differently. Chef Spencer tries his best to never see food wasted. And so, he’ll usually just give it to whatever customer he thinks will most likely eat it.”</p><p>…</p><p>Finishing her dinner, Parker asks, “Think they’ll come back?”</p><p>“I hope so,” Hardison says. Taking their plates to the dishwasher, he adds, “We should probably give Amy another raise.”</p><p>Taking off his shirt as he heads to the main bedroom, Eliot gripes, “You two need to do something about Hardy. It almost-”</p><p>“Parker 2000,” Hardison corrects.</p><p>“Followed the two out.”</p><p>Parker grins.</p><p>“Where’s your periodic table sweatshirt,” Eliot calls.</p><p>“Oh, right, it hasn’t been washed yet.”</p><p>“Dammit, Hardison!”</p><p>“Sorry, man. If you want, my Star Wars one is clean. It’s in the right top drawer.”</p><p>“Found it.” Coming out, he sits down.</p><p>“Hey, are you staying the night,” Parker asks.</p><p>“Yeah. I need to oversee a delivery in the morning.”</p><p>Parker squeezes Hardison’s hand.</p><p>“Cool. Parker and I are going to bed soon. Want to join us?”</p><p>“Sounds good,” Eliot answers.</p><p>…</p><p>Mercedes isn’t sure how these people stay in business, but having found loads more coupons and double-checking them, she’s not going to complain.</p><p>She’s also not telling the others.</p><p>This, she firmly insists to herself, is nothing like Kurt.</p><p>She wishes she could convince herself.</p><p>Amy puts another vase of beautiful flowers on their table.</p><p>After they order, Sam takes a deep breath. “Can I tell you a secret?”</p><p>“Yeah, sure. Of course. I promise I won’t tell anyone.”</p><p>“My dad might have a new job soon. There’s this new company that’s supposed to be opening up in Ohio, and they’ve already called him. He and my mom have been doing a lot of research, and everything seems legit.”</p><p>“Sam, that’s amazing!” Realising she’s grabbed his hand, she squeezes. “I’ll pray that he gets it.”</p><p>Smiling, he squeezes back. “Thanks, Mercedes. That means a lot to me.”</p><p>“Do you-” Noticing a man has come over, she pauses.</p><p>The man is white and nice-looking, but he has a creepy skull on the back of his left hand and the numbers 1488 on his fingers. Wondering if it’s some sort of special history or religious date, telling herself to smile, she considers the best way to ask only to find-</p><p>The chef from yesterday just literally knocked the man out of the door, and her head is being turned by hands that aren’t painful but are firm. “Hey, it’s okay, kiddos,” a gentle voice says. “Don’t worry about that. So, you two are in Glee? What school are y’all from?”</p><p>A tall black man smiles down at them, and when Sam squeezes her hand, she looks over, but the hand on the side of her head is still there. To prevent her from looking outside, she knows.</p><p>Coming over, Amy has a shaky smile. “It’s okay. This is Mister Hardison, the owner. That man Chef Eliot just removed isn’t welcome here.”</p><p>“Just Hardison,” the man corrects. “No need for any of that formal stuff.”</p><p>“Uh, we’re from Ohio,” Sam says. “McKinley. We were supposed to go to New York for a competition, but that suddenly changed.”</p><p>The hand on her head is removed, and looking over, she sees the chef coming in. Over than some bruising on his right knuckles, he looks fine.</p><p>“You two alright?”</p><p>“Yeah, they’re good. You got him out before he could do or say anything,” Hardison says.</p><p>“Good.” Squeezing Sam’s shoulder, the chef goes back to the kitchen.</p><p>After the other two leave, Sam says, “Well, that was weird.”</p><p>“Totally. But hey, at least, we’re getting free food that’s really good. Do you think that man, the one thrown out, is okay?”</p><p>Sam shrugs. “I don’t think they would have thrown him out without a good reason.”</p><p>Fair enough, she decides.</p><p>“Mercedes, I’m not sure how to ask this, and it’s probably none of my business, but- do you only date black guys?”</p><p>“What? No? Obviously, I’m not really dating anyone right now, but no, I wouldn’t limit myself like that.” Through her confusion, she remembers the conversation they had yesterday.</p><p>“My parents, they’d really like it if I found a nice black man to marry. And some of my other family members are even worse. But really, my parents are pretty cool. They just want me to find someone I like who’ll treat me right.”</p><p>Sam nods. “My parents, they made it clear when I was little that colour shouldn’t matter but sometimes does to a lot of people. I was a little worried when I started dating Santana, but they liked her. Didn’t really know her, but hey, at least, I know, if they did, it’d be more that than anything else.”</p><p>She tells herself to keep quiet.</p><p>Whether this is fair or not, she doubts Mr and Mrs Evans would be near as cool with someone much darker dating any of their kids.</p><p>“Besides, I shouldn’t date until after high school, anyways. Fooling myself into thinking a gay guy is into me or going absolutely psycho and busting a window was as good enough indicator as anything.” Seeing his look, she quickly adds, “But I swear, I’m never, ever doing something like that ever again.”</p><p>“Okay? Is there- there definitely sounds like there’s a story there.”</p><p>“Kurt wasn’t out when Glee started, and I was stupid and desperate and pathetic. So, I convinced myself we were dating, and then, when he made it clear we weren’t, I threw a brick through his wind-shield. Um, I did try to pay for it, but his dad wouldn’t let me, and my parents, they were real disappointed. I don’t blame them. They should have punished me way more than they did.”</p><p>“Would you go out with me? Be my girlfriend?”</p><p>She’s going to give Sam the benefit of the doubt. She must have misheard something. Likely, he was asking her to help get him back together with Quinn or Santana or to help him get together with some other girl (hopefully, not Brittany, but that’d make sense, she’ll concede).</p><p>Because, if he’s decided to make mean jokes, even if it gets her literally thrown out, she’s gonna pour her drink all over him.</p><p>Probably.</p><p>“That came out wrong. Sort of.” Sam gives her a half-smile that hurts to look at. “Um, I’m going to be totally honest here.”</p><p>“I have so little game. Like almost none at all. Quinn only dated me, because, I was the popular quarterback, and Santana only dated me, because, actually, I’m still not exactly sure what that was about, but we should probably come up with a plan to either get her together with Brittany for real or- I’m rambling.”</p><p>“Yeah, you are,” she agrees. “But that’s okay. It might be nice if her and Brittany gave things a real shot. Artie might be a problem, though, seeing as how he’s still way hung up on her.”</p><p>Sam takes a deep breath. “I like you, Mercedes. I think I liked you before prom. You’re funny and nice and so pretty. And I know I don’t have money to take you on dates right now, and if this job doesn’t go through, my family might have to leave, and I might have to take my brother and sister on any dates I can manage to scrape enough money for-”</p><p>It hits her: He’s serious.</p><p>This makes no sense, but-</p><p>“Sam.” She squeezes his wrist. “Okay, look, did Puck give you any cupcakes or brownies or anything to drink before we came here?”</p><p>“No. Puck’s still in the Portland juvie centre, remember?”</p><p>Right, she’d been told about the one a.m. incident, but since she’d been one of the ones lucky enough to sleep through it-</p><p>“Okay. But did you-”</p><p>“Mercedes, Puck has nothing to do with this.”</p><p>She’s not so sure, but she’s also not sure saying, ‘Hey, don’t panic, but there’s a possibility you might’ve been drugged or unknowingly drank something alcohol-spiked,’ in a Portland restaurant would be a great idea.</p><p>“Do you remember that time your cousins were staying over, and you came into Glee in that tie-dye shirt with that scarf half-wrapped around your hair?”</p><p>Unable to stop her groan, she answers, “As much as I wish I could forget, yeah.”</p><p>“I don’t ever want to forget,” Sam softly says. “I felt guilty, like, really guilty, because, I was with Quinn, but looking at you- I knew you were pretty, but I looked at you, and suddenly, there was this beautiful girl standing in front of me. And I just suddenly liked you more than I should have given that I had a girlfriend.”</p><p>“There was nothing beautiful about me that day. I was tired and wearing a shirt about two-sizes two small that had baby throw-up on it, my hair was a mess, and I was literally ranting about how the world should just end already.”</p><p>“It was funny. You were. I felt bad for you, but outside of certain movies, I didn’t think hearing someone go on about the world ending could be funny until that day.”</p><p>It feels too nice when he squeezes her hand. “I said yes to going to the prom with you and Rachel, because, it meant getting to go with you. I know I don’t have much to offer right now-”</p><p>She kisses him before she can think.</p><p>It’s one of the best kisses she’s ever had, and taking in the soft, happy look on his face and in his eyes, she knows it was good for him, too.</p><p>“Sam, I wouldn’t date someone for their money. Okay, if we went out, we could find things that didn’t cost money, and even when you had some to spare, there are times we could go Dutch, and on really special occasions, I might want to treat both of us. The world is changing, and I don’t think it should just always be the guy paying for the girl. And you know I don’t mind helping baby-sit Stevie and Stacie. I think it’s great you’re so close to them.”</p><p>“So, is that a yes, then?”</p><p>“It’s a strong maybe. We should talk a little before making a final decision.”</p><p>He nods. “Okay.”</p><p>“My parents would be fine with you. Are you absolutely sure yours would be with me?”</p><p>“Yeah. I promise, Mercedes. They’d really like you. The real you. More than they did Santana’s act.”</p><p>“Okay. If we start dating, I’m not saying we should hide it, but I do think it might be best to wait to tell everyone until after we get back to Ohio and everyone is in a relatively drama-free place.”</p><p>“That’s probably a good idea. But I’d want to tell my parents right away.”</p><p>“Yeah, me too,” she says.</p><p>“So? Mercedes Jones, would you do me the honour of being my girlfriend?”</p><p>This could go badly, she knows. For all Sam’s a sweet, cool guy, they live in Ohio. The white quarterback dating the black drama girl doesn’t happen, and if it does, it might go badly for both of them.</p><p>Looking at his face, though, she wants to kiss him again, and she never wants to see the type of hurt she saw when he exploded about how he and his family were homeless. She knows it wouldn’t hurt as much as that, but it’d still hurt.</p><p>“It’d be my pleasure, Sam Evans.”</p><p>…</p><p>After they finish lunch, Amy insists they call someone to come pick them up, and while they’re waiting, the scary chef guy comes over with a cart of the most delicious-smelling cookie bouquets she’s ever seen. One of them in particular is beyond magazine pretty.</p><p>“Want to buy your girlfriend a cookie bouquet for five bucks?”</p><p>“No, tha-” She starts.</p><p>“That’d be great, thanks.” Sam pulls out his wallet. Then, looking at her with puppy eyes, he says, “I have some money, and I want to do something special for my girlfriend.”</p><p>“Thank you,” she says.</p><p>Grinning, he hands the money over. “That one?”</p><p>Seeing he’s pointing to the most beautiful one, she nods.</p><p>“Here you go, sweetie.” The chef hands it to her. “Save enough so that you can eat a proper dinner, and don’t have this for breakfast. Or at least, not by itself.”</p><p>She realises, Okay. This scary chef guy isn’t scary. He’s just an intense guy who probably drives his friends and family crazy with his mother-henning.</p><p>“Thank you. Don’t worry, sir. My dad’s a dentist, so.”</p><p>He smiles at them. “Good.”</p><p>“Oh, Mr Schue’s here.”</p><p>Managing not to groan, she reflects: Kurt is <em>so</em> dead. “Alright, just tell me he doesn’t have Puck with him.”</p><p>“No, it looks like he’s all alone.”</p><p>“We’d better go, then. Thank you for the cookie bouquet, chef.”</p><p>She stands up, and Sam takes her hand.</p><p>Smiling, he asks, “Ready?”</p><p>Squeezing it, she can’t wait until they get some private time to kiss and talk more. “Yeah. Ready.”</p><p>…</p><p>Upstairs, Eliot says, “Lovebirds got safely back to their hotel.”</p><p>“Awesome, baby.” Hardison glances over from his laptop. “I’ll tell Parker when she gets back. Any plans tonight?”</p><p>“I was thinking of getting dinner with this pretty little blonde I met.”</p><p>“Cool. Oh! Hey, do you want me to get you and her a reservation at that new French place you’ve been talking about?”</p><p>At Eliot’s look, Hardison sighs. “What? What is it with you lately, man? I know, I know, ‘I can get my own reservations, Hardison!’ Try to do something nice-”</p><p>“Do you and Parker ever sleep with anyone else? I mean, do you two ever do threesomes with someone else?”</p><p>“What? No.” Leaving the laptop, Hardison comes over. “We wouldn’t do that to you, Eliot.”</p><p>“You do realise dinner with this woman will probably lead to me having sex with her.”</p><p>“Yeah. And you know what would probably help? Unless she’s not into French food, a reservation at that new French restaurant.”</p><p>Eliot sighs.</p><p>“If you want to disappear, go ahead, but you should know, I’ve already texted Parker. The three of us need to talk, man. So, we’ll likely be here whenever you get back.”</p><p>“I’m getting a beer.”</p><p>Doing so, Eliot sits down.</p><p>When Parker appears, Hardison kisses her. “Hey, mama. Eliot’s going through something.”</p><p>“Dammit, Hardison-”</p><p>Sitting down next to him, Parker starts playing with his hair. “What’s going on?”</p><p>“Eliot’s worried we might have sex with someone besides him.”</p><p>“That’s not it,” Eliot growls.</p><p>“What is it, then? We wouldn’t have sex with anyone but each other and you, Eliot.”</p><p>Closing his eyes, Eliot takes a deep breath. “I’ve never asked that of you two.”</p><p>“It really isn’t about asking, dude,” Hardison says. “Me and Parker are good together. Great, even. But you fit with us. I really doubt we’d ever find someone else who did. With you, it’s just natural.”</p><p>“You two- You were supposed to- It was having a threesome. Then, it was having threesomes. It wasn’t supposed to be some three-way, actual relationship!”</p><p>“Eliot has a date tonight. Might be someone important.”</p><p>“Oh,” Parker says. “Well, we knew this might happen. We’re gonna need her real full name and social security number. I promise, we’d only ever hurt her if she hurt you, but we need to know about-”</p><p>“Parker. Hardison.” Eliot stands up.</p><p>Hardison takes his hand. “Hey, I’m not one for sexual jealousy. You know that, Eliot. You and Parker are the only two I want, but if either of you want sex with someone else, that’s fine. And in your case, if you fall in love with someone-”</p><p>“It’s a dinner date. I doubt I’m going to marry this girl.”</p><p>“Then, there’s not a problem.” Parker says. “You and Hardison are the only two I want, and being completely honest, I’m not sure how I’d feel about him wanting sex with someone other than me or you, but I’m okay with you having sex with people besides us.”</p><p>“Eliot.” Hardison squeezes his hand, and Eliot looks over. “I don’t know how things might change in the future, but you’re always gonna be important to us. And hopefully, always an active part of our lives. If you don’t want to sleep with us anymore, that’s cool. If you want to keep doing it, that’s definitely cool. The three of us, though, ‘til death, right? That’s the current plan?”</p><p>“It’s the only plan,” Eliot says.</p><p>Coming over, Parker nudges against him.</p><p>“I need to call the woman. Cancel.”</p><p>“You don’t need to,” Parker says.</p><p>Looking at them, he responds, “Yeah, I do. I don’t have exactly everything figured out, but hey, today, we helped these two kids, good boy, sweet girl, get together. It won’t exactly be easy for them, but if they have a chance in this world-” He shrugs.</p><p>“If you want to sleep with us even when we don’t have sex, you can,” Parker says. “Sometimes, I need to sleep by myself, but you could just sleep with Hardison on those nights.”</p><p>Hardison nods. “Yeah, and if you ever wanna move in, even if that doesn’t involve sleeping with us or sex, we’d be down with that.”</p><p>“I shouldn’t have made those plans in the first place.”</p><p>“No, you shouldn’t have,” Hardison agrees. “Not to try to force some confrontation.”</p><p>Parker pokes Eliot.</p><p>Leading Eliot to the sofa, Hardison pulls him down, and wrapping an arm over Eliot’s shoulders, he wraps the other around Parker when she sits on his lap. “Together, baby. I know you’re still getting used to that.”</p><p>“It’s okay,” Parker adds. “It took me almost five years.”</p><p>“And it was definitely worth it,” Hardison says. He kisses her, and then, presses closer against Eliot. “Look, we’re yours, Eliot. If you want to be ours, that’s great, but-”</p><p>“I am yours. Both of y’alls.”</p><p>“You don’t have to make any changes your not comfortable with. Uh, actually, saying that, there are some changes, you not taking on dangerous missions without us anymore, you not holing up by yourself when you get badly injured, but sex, dating, rearranging the menu for the eighth time-”</p><p>“I’ve told you, this time of the year, it’s best-”</p><p>“All that, you don’t need to change.”</p><p>“I just want it to be us three,” Eliot quietly says. “I’m still going to flirt on occasion, but I don’t want sex or dating with anyone but you two.”</p><p>“Then, that's how it will be,” Parker announces.</p><p>“Yeah,” Hardison agrees. “Like I said, you don’t need to worry about us doing either with anyone else. I’m not up for sex tonight, but me and Parker are planning to check out that sci-fi movie that Sam kid kept talking about. Want to join us?”</p><p>Leaning over, Eliot kisses Hardison, and then, squeezes Parker’s hand. “That sounds good.”</p>
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